All You Need Is Love . . . and Brussels Sprouts

Recently, my husband and I attended a wedding for his boss in Fredericksburg, VA.  It is almost a two hour drive from our home to this location, yet despite the distance, we planned to drive down for the wedding and then return later that night.  The drive down was uneventful, thankfully, as you never know what you might hit when you have to drive near and around DC.  I’ve had the pleasant experience of sitting in massive traffic at midnight on the DC beltway.  But since we left our home 3 hours before the wedding started, in anticipation of such a possibility, we arrived in Fredericksburg about an hour before the wedding.  Not really knowing what “heavy hor d’oeuvres” would entail at the reception, we grabbed a quick bite a few blocks from the church at a cute little pizza place that served tapas in the bar.  We ordered a few tapas to share, and it was the perfect amount of food to tide us over for the remainder of the afternoon.

The wedding itself was lovely, if longer than normal, since it was a full service with communion and everything.  But, after an hour of sitting, standing, sitting, standing, standing, standing (luckily no kneeling), sitting, standing again . . . the ceremony ended with a full participant sing-along of the bride and groom’s favorite song:  All You Need Is Love by The Beatles.

Song

All You Need Is Love

When we first arrived at the ceremony, I reviewed the program and saw this printed on the last page.  Commenting to my husband, “I guess somebody is a fan of Love Actually,” we both wondered if there would be a horn section that would pop out of the pews randomly, and if a choir would appear in the upper balconies that lined either side of the church.  Honestly, we were both kind of hoping that would occur.

Click on picture for movie clip.

Click on picture for movie clip.

Once the sing-along ended, the wedding party exited the church and set up in the atrium for greetings, as you do.  While we were waiting for our turn to depart our seats, having been seated towards the back of the church, we turned and chatted it up with some of my husband’s colleagues sitting behind us.  As I was standing there, facing the back of the church, I happened to look up, and saw this:

Organ

Oh my god!  It is just like Love Actually!!  I was kind of disappointed at that point that they didn’t take advantage of this huge behemoth of an organ and have a full on musical accompaniment with their final movie-inspired song.  What a waste!

After the wedding, we made the two block trek to the reception locale, which was at a local wine bar/restaurant.  Upon entering the establishment, we were greeted by a waiter holding a tray of sparkling bubbly goodness that he was handing out to each guest.  As I am off the sauce for the time being, I declined and asked if he had anything non-alcoholic, like sparkling cider.  He informed me that they had lots of sodas to choose from.  Hmmm.  Not being a soda drinker, I opted for water.

Once we moved into the main area of the restaurant, we encountered a long table, filled with food items.  There was blue cheese and feta, there were some lovely lunch meats ala a charcuterie platter, and there were raw oysters.  Hmmm, again.  Realizing that I could not partake in any one of those items, I stood watching the hubs partake in these delicacies, while hoping that some other types food items would be served at some point.  After chatting with a few of my husband’s work friends, I realized that although my shoes were relatively comfy, after the up/down, up/down ceremony, the walk to the restaurant, and now standing for a stretch, I was actually getting more hungry for a seat than anything else.

Oysters

Nope to all of that.

A little while after settling in at a small cocktail table, a waiter walked over with some additional goodies on a tray.  He placed before us a lovely little bowl full of salmon wrapped around an herb spread.  Um, gee thanks.  It looked delicious, and more than booze, what I miss the most in my new restricted pregnancy diet, is sushi.  So this was just an awful tease.  In the “foods Misty can eat at the wedding” game, so far, I was striking out completely!

Salmon

Not nice.

Finally, after some time, we saw another guest walk by with some kind of vegetable on their plate.  The hubs, knowing that I was getting frustrated watching everyone else eat, and having had previous experience with a hungry, pregnant wife, decided to run up to the food table to see what was new that he could possibly retrieve for me.  Unfortunately, all he returned with was news that there were some roasted brussels sprouts brought out, but apparently they were scooped up as soon as they were set down.  (Was everyone there pregnant?).  He assured me that he spoke to someone, and that they would let us know as soon as more arrived.  At this point, I had merely consumed 3 glasses of water.

Eventually (this had to be after a full hour of being at this reception), an angelic lady walked over to our table with a huge bowl brimming with the most delectable brussels sprouts ever served.  She scooped about half of the bowl onto our plate, and what commenced was probably the fastest eating of a vegetable ever recorded in human history.  I scarfed those things!  They were delicious.  Either that, or I was experiencing a feeling akin to having the munchies whilst high on the weed, where anything I would have eaten at that point would have tasted like manna.  Or so I assume.

Luckily, those brussels sprouts broke the damn of food served that was appropriate for pregnant person consumption.  Thus followed some grilled shrimp, lobster egg rolls, seaweed wraps, beef spare ribs, and eventually a wonderfully decadent flourless chocolate cake.

By the time we left the reception for our long drive home, I was fully sated.  However, that didn’t stop the hubs and I from stopping at a local Arby’s to order a few items.  A shake for me, some cheese filled pretzels for him.  (I tasted them, by the way, and would not recommend them to anyone).

The moral of my story seems to be that while weddings are full of love and happiness and new beginnings, they are not the best place for pregnant people.  And also, that next time I need to cram some snacks into my little purse, along with my phone and lipstick.

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20 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. susielindau
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 09:56:55

    We call it the “hangries” – hungry + angry. Last summer, I was in between surgeries and traveled to Europe. I was always in search of something healthy to eat which was easy in Spain and France, but in England? Yep the hangries got the best of me a couple of times!!!
    It sounds like a fun wedding anyway!

    Reply

    • mistyslaws
      Jun 23, 2014 @ 12:45:15

      It was fun. And it became increasingly hilarious each time they brought out some other raw treat. But I was starting to experience the hangries for sure!

      Oh boy, English cuisine. Yep, I can definitely see the hangries taking over. Everything is fried or disgusting over there (The Awfuls? Really?), pretty much. Except for their scones. Mmmmm, scones.

      Reply

  2. Hippie Cahier
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 10:02:48

    1. The hubs is such a good hubs.
    2. I frequently cite someone I know who refers to church ceremonies as “StandUpSitDownSingSingSing.” He says it really fast. Cracks me up.
    3. I realize this is tantamount to saying I want to marry pumpkin, but I’m just going to out myself and announce that I love brussel sprouts.

    Reply

  3. Kitten Thunder's Girl
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 10:53:54

    So…I’m not a doctor, but something you should look into as a sushi lover: the risk from sushi is that you might get food poisoning. Regular food poisoning. Which isn’t a problem for baby, just doubly unpleasant if you are pregnant. My understanding is that you can continue to eat sushi from reputable place – like NOT the gas station. It’s not like raw beef where you could get listeria, which is bad for everyone.

    Worth looking into, if that’s what you miss the most.

    Please don’t consider this pregnancy advice – insert small print about me knowing nothing here….

    Reply

  4. bluzdude
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 11:24:08

    Re: that huge pipe organ…

    I have this fantasy that one day I’ll be in a wedding, where the pre-event music is played on one of those organs. OK, that happens all the time; the part I’m dreaming about is where that lazy Bach fugue suddenly transforms into Boston’s “Foreplay/Long Time.”

    That should get people on their feet for the bride…

    Reply

  5. donofalltrades
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 11:53:56

    I don’t know what love actually is, but once, in law school, I totally argued with some dumb bitch about love and marriage in a family law class. I was 30 and already married and on my way to screwing up Ace’s life as her dad, and this broad was maybe 23 and not married (probably not in a relationship at all since she was such a bitch). I said bitch because I wasn’t sure if I could say cunt here on your page. Can I? I won’t out of respect, if you say so. Anyway, my point was love has so very little to do with making a marriage work. You can love each other all you want, but if you don’t agree on money or how to raise the kids or where to live or 10000 other things, then your marriage is doomed to fail. It was a night class and I may have been at Humphrey’s Tavern too long before class that night.

    Also, your husband is super nice. I would have said, “Remember dear, this was totally YOUR idea” after every delicious bite I took in front of your face, then I’d have told everyone, “Don’t worry, I can drink as much as I want because my pregnant wife is my DD” before every drink of alcohol. Lol. Yeah, I’m a catch I know it.

    Reply

    • mistyslaws
      Jun 23, 2014 @ 12:51:02

      Ah, the stary eyed idealism of young girls. Yeah, she’s probably been divorced twice by now. They all figure it out eventually. Mostly.

      Yes, he IS super nice. But I’m pretty sure he was saying all of that on the inside, where it belongs. I’m surprised you don’t get smacked more, Don.

      Reply

  6. Andrea @ Maybe It's Just Me
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 14:21:32

    I am sorry you missed out on what appear to be salmon vaginas. Two words…bigger purse!

    Reply

  7. Valentine Logar
    Jun 11, 2014 @ 12:50:28

    Snacks, yes those you should carry. But seems the dam broke eventually and ever so well. Loved that clip!

    Reply

    • mistyslaws
      Jun 23, 2014 @ 12:52:25

      Yes, once the real food came, I ate well, but it seemed an eternity in pregnant person years before that happened. I haven’t been pregnant in a long time. I forgot the snacks rule. Never again!

      Reply

  8. She's a Maineiac
    Jun 11, 2014 @ 18:17:12

    I’ve craved many a strange thing while pregnant but I wouldn’t eat a Brussels sprout if it were deep fried in chocolate sauce (stole that from Seinfeld)

    Reply

    • mistyslaws
      Jun 23, 2014 @ 12:53:09

      Well, I wasn’t craving them, they just happened to be the only thing I could eat. But I love them anyway. What if they were fried up with bacon? Mmmm, bacon.

      Reply

  9. Go Jules Go
    Jun 13, 2014 @ 09:33:12

    I’m ashamed to admit I wouldn’t have even thought of “Love, Actually” until you pointed it out. I did, however, catch on to the unfortunate string of anti-pregnant-lady starters. That’s actually uncanny (that there was NOTHING you could eat, at least in the beginning), and you’re a kind woman to say that a plate of brussels sprouts made up for it. I don’t care if they were covered in chocolate bacon! Wait. Oh dear god. Can you still have bacon?

    Reply

    • mistyslaws
      Jun 23, 2014 @ 12:56:10

      Well, not made up for it exactly. But I was in some sort of starvation delirium at that point, so I probably would have started gnawing on my husband’s leg soon and thought it was the most delicious lamb shank ever!

      Pfft, can I have bacon? I’m not dead lady. Do you think I’d get knocked up again if I couldn’t have BACON? What are you, mad? (Please note that I had bacon just last night with our “breakfast for dinner” and last week on my bacon cheeseburger).

      Reply

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