Commenting Update

This is an update on the issue people have been having with commenting on my (and other WordPress) blogs.  After weeks of back and forth with WordPress and their oh so helpful and attentive support staff (:p), it seems that the conclusion is that they “updated” (re: fucked up) their comment form so that if you have ever had a WordPress account, you must be signed in before you comment.  Here is what they responded to one reader:

We recently changed the comment form so that registered email address to WordPress.com can’t be used unless you’re logged in.  This is to avoid people from showing avatar by entering someone else’s address.

Please login as WordPress.com user “xxxxxxx” or use Twitter/Facebook login to comment.

Aside from the lovely grammatical structure of that sentence . . . what I take from it is that WordPress is basically a bunch of fascists.  If you have ever had a WordPress account and used your email address, you will not be able to comment unless you first login with that email address at WordPress.com.  Either that or use a Facebook/Twitter login to comment.  Or I guess you could just use another email address if you have one.

So, I hope that clears it all up for everyone!!  Pfft.

Sorry about this guys.  It seems that it is not just my site being an asshole, so unfortunately I am not going to be able to “fix” the problem.  It is now just something that everyone will have to deal with if they want to comment.  I know it’s a pain in the ass, but I would suggest just commenting with your Facebook or Twitter account, because that seems easier.  Unless you want to jump through all the hoops and go to WordPress to figure out what your user/password was whenever you signed up before AND make sure you are logged in before you comment, or you will lose whatever you have written once you hit submit.

This sucks.  I’m really sorry.

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The Ninth Circle of Hell

This past weekend I was forced to go to an event that I would rather wash my eyes out with bleach than attend . . . the dreaded BRIDAL SHOWER. Dun dun duuuuuuunnnnnn.

I hate any type of Shower. Be it Bridal, Wedding, Golden . . . I am not a fan. Actually, I would almost rather you pee on me than have to sit through 3 hours of awkward social interaction and forced joviality at seeing other people open presents. Almost.

We’ve all been there. Well, if you have a vagina you have. Some men have been forced to do these things as well recently, what with the new “couples shower” trend. And to that I say . . . Ha Ha!! Oh, sorry. But really. Us women get the short end of this stick. Guys are never expected to ooh and aah over tiny little pink bibs and blankets while eating canapés around a bunch of women you probably don’t even know. Lucky bastards. So, if you get dragged into one of these events, and you have a penis, I can’t find the strength to summon any pity for your plight. I’ve been in hell far too long to have any empathy for new arrivals.

Now, here’s the thing. I have had 2 showers thrown for me in my life. First for wedding, then for first baby. So, I might sound like a hypocrite when I state my intense dislike for these things. But let’s get real. I hated both of mine as well. Nobody likes these things, unless they are deranged. Not the attendees, the guest of honor and most certainly not the people throwing the fucking things. I have been that person as well. Numerous times. Just stab me in the ear with a tiny shrimp fork right now.

But showers are not about enjoyment. No. They are about one thing and one thing only. Presents. They are a socially mandated excuse for massive amounts of gifts.  That is it. Well, that and drinking, but that might just be me. Lots and lots of drinking.

The problem is the people who do not realize the purpose for these showers. The women who take these things way too seriously. The women that want these events to last for hours and hours, to be able to ooh and aah over every single teensy tiny baby outfit and/or serving dish, to play endless ridiculous games. These women are usually the aunts and/or mother of the bride/momma-to-be. Hateful hateful women.

At each of my own showers, I begged and pleaded. I bargained. I cried. I demanded and put my foot down. Both feet!! But alas, I did not get my way. I was told that it was the way of these things. That it must be done. So I eventually was overruled and had to succumb to the inevitable . . . sitting there and opening every single one of those damn gifts at the party so that I could hear the requisite cooing over the cuteness of the items or usefulness of the crockpots. Gah.

This past weekend was actually relatively painless as showers go. I mean, still hell, but more of a nice roasting rather than an all-consuming hellfire and brimstone sort of feeling. I actually knew a couple of people so I could sit there and chat (i.e. snark) for the duration. They had alcohol and luckily my niece was there to actually serve me with pomegranate champagne (sounds odd, but it was yummy!) and get me numerous refills. Also, pretty much the moment the bride-to-be walked in the door, her mom sat her right down and she started to open presents. And she ripped through those suckers in about an hour. Then there was food and cake. All in all, it was better than most I have been to where the bride/momma mingles for an hour or so and then there are forced games and then they open presents. This was refreshing. I’m not even going to mention the 2 games they played. Mostly because I had a nice buzz, continued chatting with my SIL and completely ignored their existence. I am oh so sad that I didn’t win either the glass votive holder or the tiny little change purse that were the prizes.

This was one . . . is it wrong to just check them all and be done with this madness?

My niece and I decided that for the next shower we attend, possibly hers if she will get around to getting engaged any time soon (this was her brother’s fiance’s shower by the way), that there would be rules. No present opening (we’ll see if that happens . . . I know her mom), no games, and every time someone says ooh or aah over something adorable . . . DRINK! Any discussion of the (wink) wedding night (wink) . . . DRINK! Any talk of giving birth/pain/worth it . . . DRINK! Anytime someone tells their own story about their wedding/birth of their baby . . . DRINK!

You get the idea. Pretty much we will be sloshed within the first half hour. Guaranteed. That will be the Best. Shower. EVER!

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Worst shower story? Any other ideas for what we should drink to?  Wanna see the most horrifically disturbing cake I have ever laid eyes on?  Ok, but I’m warning you . . . it’s pretty damn creepy . . .

So very wrong . . .

Welcome to 2007!!

I have two boys, aged 3 and 6.  And even though they are boys, I have never previously bought them any gaming systems.  I never got them an Xbox 360 or Playstation or Wii.  No Nintendo DS or any handheld games.  The only thing I got my oldest son was a V-Reader, but that is more of a story reader type thing.

I’ve been trying to avoid the inevitable.  The glassy eyed staring at a TV for all hours of the day, playing games in which they are chasing and shooting and blowing up other characters on the screen.  They are boys.  I know that eventually they are going to want to play those types of violent shooting killing games.  Is it too much to ask that we delay that until they are teenagers?  That’s not unreasonable, right?

Well, recently my oldest has been interested in computer games.  First, it started with some basic free games he played on the computer while his dad was working in his office.  Soccer or Tetris type games.  Nothing violent and nothing that involved playing other people through the computer.  But recently, he has become obsessed with these games.  He wakes up in the morning and it is the first thing he wants to do.  When I check to see what types of games he is playing, I see that he is playing something where a shark is leaping out of the water to kill people in boats and blow up ships.  (To which he tells me that he is trying to avoid the boats with people and if he does blow them up, he is only getting the bad guys).  I see banner ads on the bottom of the screen which say “Do you like this game  YES  NO” which my son would never know was an ad that would take him to another site if he clicks on it.  I fear him finding a game where there is someone else out there that he is playing against.  I fear predators.  And I fear he is obsessed with being on the computer.

So, the hubs and I decided it was finally time to get a system.  We needed to be able to control our son’s playing time and what he was playing.  We thought maybe for my son’s birthday in June.  But while the hubs was away last week, I realized how obsessed my kid was with the computer games and realized that we needed to get a system immediately.  I happened to mention this to a colleague who was moving and she told me that she would be willing to sell me her Wii because she never used it anymore.  She not only had the Wii, but the Fit and a bunch of games and she gave me all of it for a very good deal.

So, as of Sunday afternoon, we finally were part of the Wii-nation.  Woo-hoo!!  We are so current and with the times, y’all.  I might have to celebrate by doing the Dougie and wearing my Jams!  My son has already been playing all of the games, and of course his favorite is the shooting tanks game.  Great.  Problem solved, right?  I personally like the fishing game and the riding the cows game (see how technical I am now?) and even the pool game, but I sort of suck at that one.  Oh well, I only just started.  I am looking forward to trying some of the Fit stuff and even the Zumba I borrowed from my secretary.  Maybe I can play my way to a smaller ass along with keeping my son from becoming a computer playing zombie.  Win-win?

Although, according to the hubs when I talked to him this morning, we are of course now having issues with the stupid thing.  Maybe because it has been sitting unplayed for a year and it needs to be updated/cleaned/wiped?  I don’t know.  But a couple of the games are not working, including one completely brand new plastic sealed one, so I know it’s not the games.  Hmmm.  Anyone else have any issues with their Wii and any tips they can share?  I know I’m pretty much the last person on the planet to get one of these things so I’m hoping all of you more experienced people out there (yes, I just called you all Wii-sluts), can help a sister out.  My son is already obsessed with the thing and I would hate to have to give it back because it doesn’t work so much.  I mean . . . we already made our Mii’s and everything!!

Convos with the Kiddos: Part 2

My three year old has been very vocal lately . . .

Talking to me:

3: Have you been old?

Me: I’M NOT OLD!

3: Yes, you are. You are an old lady.

Me: (Thanks a lot, kid). No, I’m only 4!

3: (Laughing). No you’re not . . . you’re 6. You’re old.

Me: (6? Ok, I’ll take it).

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Story time:

Once upon a time, there was a little kitten. She was very sad because she lost her mommy. And then she lived happily ever after because she was with her mommy again. The end.

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Me: You should go outside to play.

3: I prefer to stay inside.

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Conversation between me, 6 and 3:

3: What is under rainbows?

Me: A pot of gold.

6: And leprechauns. And unicorns.

Me: (Hmm, that’s new . . . ) Unicorns?

6: Yeah.

Me: Where did you hear that?

6: In movies and stuff.

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6 and I are watching Dancing with the Stars (of course), and he starts singing along to one of the songs:

This isn’t like The Voice or anything, so I can sing now.

(Might be because I have told him to hush so I can actually hear the singer singing on the show, when he tries to butcher the song sing along).

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We are talking about Christmas presents for some reason:

6: Coal. What does it do?

Me: Nothing, you just get it if you are bad.

6: Well, if you owned a train, you would want to be bad so you could get coal.

(Little stinker).

Testing, testing . . .

This is not a real post.  This is a post that has come about based on the fact that numerous people are telling me they are either unable to comment on my site at all, or they are forced to log in either under Facebook or twitter or another email address not corresponding to their gravitar or WordPress account.

I assumed this was a WordPress issue across the board and was hoping they would fix it and all would be well.  I had not heard back from my many inquiries that I have made since last Friday, so assumed they were just bombarded with emails and that was why they were lagging behind on their answers.

Well, I have finally gotten a response.  And it seems that it is not across the board.  It also seems that there is nothing wrong with my site, according to support:

I took a look and everything seems to be working properly. They should be able to comment without an account. Otherwise ask them to send us a screenshot through this e-mail address:  support@wordpress.com.

So, that is what I am asking.  Obviously, all is not working properly, or I would not be getting emails from everyone telling me that they cannot comment, or having people comment but having to approve them anew because they are submitting the comment with a different email that they have not previously had to use.  Obviously, this is all a big pain in the ass for you, and I do not want anyone to have to be frustrated just trying to leave a comment, or alternately not be able to do so at all.  Especially when there are prizes to be won!!  🙂

Accordingly, I am asking that those who have not been able to comment, please attempt to do so again.  If, once again, you are unable to comment, take a screen shot of the page that denies you (alt+PrtScn), and please email it to the above address. 

Also, even if you have been able to comment using a different email or account, please try to comment the way you normally are able and when you are denied, take a screenshot and email it to them.

Please help me out with this everyone.  I don’t know what you are seeing and I need them to know what is going on, since they are not seeing a problem from their end. 

I live for your comments.  I love all of you peeps and the fact that you want to say something is invaluable to me.  I don’t want to lose that or for you all to get discouraged and just go away.  That would break my cold dead heart.  Don’t make me beg!!!

Ahem.  Sorry about that.  I hate it when I get all gushy and demanding.

But really, if you could help me out with this, I would really appreciate it. 

Hopefully, with a group effort, we can get this all sorted out in time for more hilarious posts from yours truly.  Because if the problem persists, I may have to suspend my upcoming planned posts until we can resolve it, because I don’t want anyone to not have access as they should.  And I know you don’t want to miss out on all my brilliant hilarity, now do you??  Don’t do that to yourselves!!  It will only hurt you.   :~]

Thanks everyone.  And please let me know if you get any response from them as well.

Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

A few weeks ago, I posted about a giveaway of these items:

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Did you forget about this?  Yeah, me too.  Um, I mean no I didn’t!!  I totally meant to do this post today.  It’s not just because those WordPress bastards have yet to respond to my inquiries and I fear that people still can’t comment on my site, which makes my heart very sad.  I love my commenters.  Every notification I get that someone took the time to say something about one of my posts, makes my heart go pit-a-pat.  Seriously, I love you all and the fact that I am getting emails from people saying my site is rejecting their comments makes me equal parts sad and mad.  This needs to be fixed soon!

Anyway . . . back to this totally awesome giveaway . . .

Today is the day I will announce the winner.

Once again, I employed the services of my expert name picker for giveaway purposes.  I did not capture the moment on film this time, so you’ll just have to trust me on this.  My son picked the winner.

Who is the winner?  Well, it’s none other than . . .

VESTA VAYNE!!! 

Vesta is so deserving of these items, and I’m not just saying this because she awarded me with a Facts of Life Award on her blog, The Cowardly Feminist.  Nope, not at all.  Seriously, she is super rad.  And supplies us all with new and exciting booze recipes each and every Friday.  What’s better than that I say?  Nothing is.  Nothing at all.

So, congrats to Vesta!  Send me your address girl so I can send this stuff to you.  mistyslaws at gmail dot com.

I have another giveaway, but I am a little apprehensive about doing the giveaway today because I’m still not sure if people are able to comment on my site again, and the last two winners were commenters (although you FB likers and blog followers were surely in the running, don’t worry).

So this is what I’m going to do . . . I’m going to do the giveaway anyway.  Here it is:

Once again . . . mints or gum, I think.

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As always, these are the ways to enter for the giveaway:

1.  Follow my blog.

2.  Like me on Facebook.

3.  If you have done those things already, leave a comment if you have never done so (assuming you can comment).

4.  If you have done all of those already, do something creative in the comments.  (Once again, if you can.  If you find you cannot comment, please email me at mistyslaws at gmail dot com and let me know.  I really still need to take care of this if it is a problem and I really want to know the extent of the problem as well.  I’ve gotta get those super helpful support people [ahem] over there at WordPress to get on this problem if it is still in existence.  I will also count anyone who comments on any post this week as well, just in case it takes a couple days to fix.  Deal?  Ok, then).

Good luck, all.  And may the force be with you . . . or some such bullshit.

Whip It, Whip It Good

Raise of hands . . . who here has seen the movie Whip It?  Drew Barrymore . . . Ellen Page . . . Roller Derby?  No?  Well, if you have not see the movie, first of all, you should.  It was really good.  If you have seen the movie (and enjoyed it), you are probably going to enjoy this post.  Because it is all about the Roller Derby!!

I had the chance to once again meet my fellow blogger, Thoughtsy of Thoughts Appear, and this time we stepped it up a notch.  We made our date meeting happen at a Roller Derby in downtown Baltimore.  So, when we decided to go to the Roller Derby, we both had visions of tough, scantily clad, punk rock chics racing around and taking each other out with a well placed elbow or hip or foot, with lots of blood and bruises . . . such as the movie prepared us to expect.  Once again, though, those silly hollywood peeps raised our expectations.  What we encountered was nothing like the violently hardcore depiction of this sport as dramatized in that movie.

What we ended up seeing, though, was a really fun sport with some very talented and athletic ladies who employed more skill and strategy than brute force.  Here’s how it goes . . .

Seriously . . . read this shit. It will explain much better than I can.

Once Thoughtsy and I understood what we were watching (there is definitely a learning curve), we really started to enjoy the bouts.  It was a really fun and different experience.

Check out this Roller Derby video that I recorded.

What I probably enjoyed the most from the entire experience (except for the crazy people I saw and took pics of . . . of course . . . coming soon to a weekly whacked near you!!), were the players’ and referees’ names!  Here were some of the best ones:

  • I.M. Pain
  • CC Bang Bang (who’s number was 9mm)
  • Crowella De Vil
  • Trixy Von Doom
  • Holly Go Hardly
  • Deathany
  • Feral Kat
  • Winnie the Shrew
  • Collene Oscopy

And my (and Thoughtsy’s, I believe) personal favorite:

  • Nuckin Futz

Let me tell you, the announcers at one point actually congratulated themselves for their repetitive correct saying of that girl’s name.  There were kids there.  One slip and it all could have gone terribly wrong!

Dirty Marty . . . our sure-tongued glittery announcer.

Of course, this led to discussion as to what Thoughtsy and I thought our Roller Derby names should be.  We had some trouble coming up with anything.  Anybody have any ideas??

The refs names were as good, if not better:

– Serial Kilter:

– Professor Murder:

– Loch Ness Tomster:

– Chris’d Off:

– H.R. Rufnstuf:

– Vanna Down By the River:

And, in case you were wondering, no . . . this is not the only example of women at the derby who were super comfortable with their bodies and who were shoved into way too tiny short shorts or skirts.  I say Bravo to them.  I would never have the guts to wear something like that. 

There were 2 “bouts” scheduled that night (a bout is like a match or game in other sports).  The first was between two undefeated teams:  the Night Terrors vs. the Speed Regime.  The Night Terrors wore blue and white, the Speed Regime green/orange.  Not the most flattering of uniform colors, unfortunately.

(Please understand that all of the pics of the races are incredibly blurry as they were going much too fast for my poor little iPhone to capture.  Add to that a huge ceiling-to-glass partition net blocking our view and the pics are hopeless.  But I will show you the best of the bunch, just so you can get an idea . . .).

This is the Speed Regime warming up:

Night Terrors:

Let the bout begin!!

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As I said, there was not a lot of violence, more maneuvering around the other skaters with an occassional hip check here and there (totally legal, by the way), but there was one moment where 2 of the Speed Regime skaters somehow got tangled up with each other, resulting in one somehow getting injured enough to crawl off the field and need some medical attention.  She was ultimately just fine, but while she was laying on the ground, being looked over by medical professionals, all of the players, and even the refs, were incredibly respectful:

Everyone got down on one knee waiting for the girl to be treated.

Then, it was right back to the bout:

At one point, the bout was all tied up:

But not for long . . . the Speed Regime, while an excellent team, was no match for the Night Terrors.  Especially, Crowella de Vil, who seemed to be their best Jammer.  By the end of the bout, the Night Terrors had run away with it, with the score resembling one at a basketball game.

Once the bout between those two teams ended, it was halftime.  On deck were two more teams ready to do battle.  But first . . . cupcake eating contest!!

And let me tell you . . . I almost had to hold Thoughtsy back from running up there and volunteering her services for that contest.  She is such a joiner!!

The next bout was between 2 teams with much better outfits (Uniforms?  Costumes?).  It was a bout between the Junkyard Dolls (in pink/black) . . .

. . . and the Mobtown Mods (in red/white):

(Note that we are now down on the floor watching this bout, but they were still moving a bit too fast for my iPhone to keep up.  No netting, though, so there’s that at least!).

Bout on:

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Unfortunately, these two teams were not undefeated, as was evident by the greater amount of falling down that they were doing, and by the incredibly mismatched score after only about a half hour into the bout.  So, at that point, Thoughtsy and I decided we had our fill of Roller Derby for the evening, and did what anyone would do at that point . . . we went to get some pie:

One of the items on Thoughtsy’s list of 35 before 35, is to have some pie at Dangerously Delicious Pies, which just happened to be a couple blocks away from the Roller Derby arena.  So, obviously we had to go there after the derby . . .  

These pies have been featured on the Food Network, on several different shows, and are supposed to be the best pies in all the land.  I had obviously never heard of them.  However, if they are good enough for Elvis, then I’m game:

I ordered the Baltimore Bomb, which is a pie with a vanilla custard base and melted Berger cookies on top.  What’s that?  What on earth is a Berger cookie, you say?  Oh, you poor sweet soul.  It is only the most famous and delicious of the locally made cookies.  With a vanilla wafer bottom and an abundance of the richest and most delicious chocolate fudge on top (seriously peeps, it’s like 1/3 cookie to 2/3 chocolate . . . so flipping good!).

So, here was the pie made from these wonderfully scrumptious delicacies:

I figured a pie made of delicious cookies could not be wrong, right?  Nope.  It was just ok.  It tasted a little like a coconut cream pie, which I guess was the vanilla custard, and I really couldn’t taste the very distinct Berger cookies.  Which was a shame.  I had very high hopes, which also might have been part of the problem.  I probably should have gone with the chocolate peanut butter now that I think about it . . .

Thoughtsy got the mixed berry, and the very sweet guy who served us our pies thought that the pie he gave her was the wrong kind, so he threw in an extra . . . for free.  That’s right . . . if you are keeping count, that would now be three slices of pie for the 2 of us:

Now, I love anything free.  But unfortunately, neither of us were a fan of the mixed berry crumb pie.  I do believe Thoughtsy enjoyed her mixed berry, though:

And yes, it was actually the correct pie after all.  And it was good enough that she even ate almost all of the crust.  Which everyone knows is just a holster for all the pie filling goodness.  So, that must have been some good pie!  (Read Thoughtsy’s review of her pie here).

So, all in all it was a very enjoyable night.  Another fun outing with Thoughtsy.  Now, to figure out where we will go next . . . hopefully we will find some other fun and interesting place to go before we meet up in New York for BlogHer in August!  I don’t know if I can make it that long without another Thoughtsy fix!  🙂

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