Convos with the Kiddos: Part Five

(Psst . . . 6 is now 7.  Ok then).

My oldest, talking to his dad about the restaurant they will eventually open:

7:  And we’ll do good the first couple years, because those places on Restaurant: Impossible do well the first couple years.

I think every restaurateur should be forced to watch multiple episodes of that show, as a “what NOT to do” tutorial.


Talking about his girlfriend (yes, AGAIN):

7:  She has a lot of boyfriends, but her and I are the top.

4:  You want to kiss her all the time!

7:  Yes, but I can’t or I’ll get in trouble.  I can only kiss her on our wedding day when they say it’s ok.  On your wedding day and on . . . .

I don’t know where he’s learning this stuff about kissing and weddings, but I approve!


Talking about how old you have to be to get married . . . yes, more wedding stuff.  I don’t know.

7:  The only way 4 could marry [the au pair] (who he loves and always says he’s going to marry), is if she were put in a block of ice until he grew up to be the same age.

Me:  How would she get out?

7:  Someone would pour lots of water on her.  And sun.

Well, at least he has a plan, then.


That’s all from my oldest this time, but not to worry . . . my youngest was FULL of crazy talk recently . . .

Playing a game on his dad’s iPad, while his friend leans over to watch him:

4:  Stop busting into my space!


4:  What is the baddest thing in the world?

Me:  I don’t know, what do you think?

4:  Black bananas.


4:  I want to be flat.

Me:  What does that mean?

4:  I want to be flat on the floor and not get up.

Me:  And have people walk on you?

4:  If you lay on the floor and pretend to be flat and people walk all over you, eventually you will be flat.

Makes perfect sense to me!


4:  You know, shummy beans are inside green beans.

Yeah, no idea . . .


Me:  Do you want a chocolate/peanut butter cupcake or a red velvet?

4:  A red melmet.


4:  You know when you are tired and you can’t go to bed, what that’s called?

Me:  No, what?

4:  Starved tired.

Me:  Who told you that?

4:  Nobody.  I just knowed it!


4:  I want to be a statue when I grow up?

Me:  A statue?

4:  Yeah, it’s really hard to be a statue.  You have to break yourself down to build yourself up.  And you have to be grey.  You know . . . the color.

Hmmm.  Well, it is important for him to have aspirations, I guess.


(This is the place in which I will remind you how completely and totally obsessed with all things Angry Birds my son is).

4:  Do you know what the boomerwacker bird in Angry Birds does?  He opens his mouth and it looks like he’s going to get the other Angry Birds, but he’s not.


He went away with my parents for a few days and they took him to a fair:

4:  I rode rides and played games and won a piggy and a shark.

Me:  An Angry Birds piggy or a regular piggy?

4:  A piggy like from the farm.


4:  Do you know what angry bird scares girls?

Me:  Which one?

4:  The black one.  Because it turns red and then explodes!

And if you think I’m touching that one . . . nope!


36 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Leauxra
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 10:07:11

    I love child logic. Of course, any kid that is around me, understands sarcasm within about 10 minutes. I consider it my gift to all of my friends with children. Your welcome.


  2. Jayne
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 10:23:57

    I’ve never met your kids, but I love the hell outta them. They’re AWESOME!


  3. red
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 10:28:33

    He’s right! “Starved tired” is *exactly* what that’s called. Thank him for the phrase. I’ve been that way before, and never knew what to call it. Perfect description. You have a linguist on your hands for sure.

    By the time I was 5, I had all kinds of rules about marriage and the proper age for it, and timing, and all that. I have no idea where I got it from either.


    • mistyslaws
      Jul 16, 2012 @ 10:59:45

      I know, when he said that, I was like, “exactly!” That is so how you feel. Starved tired. He’s brilliant, my little one.

      I would think the marriage thing would be different if you are a girl, but maybe it’s just universal now. I don’t know.


  4. thoughtsappear
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 10:30:11

    I hate black bananas, too, 4.


  5. bluzdude
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 10:52:22

    The good thing about kids is that they make up words that need making up.


  6. She's a Maineiac
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 11:06:35

    I think your kids and my kids would get along very well.
    Whenever my daughter says something strange and I ask her, “who told you that?” she always says, “I told myself that.”


  7. Kitten Thunder's Girl
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 11:37:14

    Your eldest is either adorable or a future serial killer. Only time will tell. In the meantime, better keep him away from meat lockers.


    • mistyslaws
      Jul 16, 2012 @ 11:01:39

      Oh yes. We try to keep most sharp objects away from him as well. Safety first.

      And why can’t he be an adorable serial killer? Lofty goal, but I think he can manage it!!


  8. Jen
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 11:41:50

    Oh my God, I am starved tired all the damned time! Who knew there was a name for it. Your child is brilliant, I tell you! Oh…and did I hear something about a shark in there somewhere? 😉


  9. leigh
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 11:53:18

    I’d have to agree with 4 on the whole black bananas thing.. they are awful!


  10. Becca
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 12:25:44

    I love your kiddos and their conversations! How adorable is 4… and 7 just seems like quite the little man. Ohh cheek pinches all AROUND!


  11. mj monaghan
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 12:35:35

    I just knowed it!

    Best answer, ever! I’m using that one!


  12. Andi
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 14:39:03

    Aw, your kids are awesome! Enjoy the “red melmet” age because they grow out of it so fast…I vividly remember when Middlest called pajamas “jamamas” and we were so sad when he finally got the word right.


  13. Go Jules Go
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 15:06:21

    Apparently 7 is watching the Duggars (re: kissing) on top of Restaurant Impossible!

    I feel like #4 said something really profound that I’m still trying to work out in the ‘statue’ context: “You have to break yourself down to build yourself up.”

    You know how much I love these posts! 🙂


    • mistyslaws
      Jul 16, 2012 @ 11:05:08

      Oh god no! Not the Duggars! Too much to learn on that show. I don’t wanna be a 25x grandma, thanks.

      I just figure he’s been thinking about a career in the military or something. That’s what they typically are known to do there. I don’t know where he gets these things from.

      Thanks! 🙂


  14. Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 17:31:43

    I had the same “flat” philosophy as 4 but in regards to being hit by a car – I thought you went flat like in cartoons. Then, I saw a public service announcement where someone was hit by a car and they didn’t flatten and I was really confused.


    • mistyslaws
      Jul 16, 2012 @ 11:06:01

      Yeah, I wasn’t really sure where he was going with that one. I think he would probably be disappointed with the results of being walked on as well!


  15. kianwi
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 18:12:39

    That was so cute! I love hearing kid conversations. I loved “Kids Say the Darndest Things” with Bill Cosby. So funny!


  16. Andrea
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 21:38:23

    I hate it when people bust into my space…especially if they bring gross bananas! Smooch those darlings! Still think 7 might be able to help my 15 with the ladies!


  17. Valerie
    Jul 11, 2012 @ 23:14:58

    I am seriously telling my kids it’s not ok to kiss until they’re married. Thanks for the idea!




    • mistyslaws
      Jul 16, 2012 @ 11:07:33

      Hope that works. I fear that at some point he will abandon this rule. Probably around his teenaged years, I’m guessing. But good luck with that!! 🙂


  18. Phoenix Rising
    Jul 12, 2012 @ 17:14:14

    Black bananas are indeed the baddest thing in the world. And not bad like hip and cool and totally awesome, more like bad I’m about to vomit just thinking about them they’re so gross. I wasn’t 100% sure which way 4 was leaning towards.


    • mistyslaws
      Jul 16, 2012 @ 11:08:10

      Pretty sure he is leaning in the “yuck” variety of the word. Not sure he is quite down with the hip lingo that the kids are using these days. 😉


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