Weekly Whacked: Retail Ridiculousness

This very special edition of the weekly whacked will focus on some of the absurd things that I have encountered in stores and other varieties of tangible items that are just a little bit . . . WTF.

“Bubba cola . . . Refresh the redneck thirst in y’all.”  

“Bubba cola . . . The official drink of Hillbilly Handfishin.”

This is a pregnancy test . . . for sale at the checkout line at The Dollar Tree.  Yep, that’s right . . . the determination of whether or not you are with child will be made by a test that costs one whole dollar.  Grab it on your way out, along with that pack of gum and air freshener!

Also in the checkout line at the Dollar Tree . . . at home Marijuana drug test.  Side note:  the hubs just happened to be in this same store about a week after I took this picture, and thought it would be funny to buy this for me.  Oh hubs, you obviously have not been paying attention.  Have I seemed laid back and all “chill out, dude” and spaced out to you?  Not so much.  Having the munchies?  Yes, always.  But the angry, short tempered, highly stressed lady living in your house could actually use some ganja, rather than the need to be tested for it.

I love this liquor store.  Every time I walk by, they have a different quote or saying on this sign.  They definitely get points for creativity.

BY LAW, people.  They are serious about their temperature control.  You will not get colder beer, unless you are one of those lawless hooligans that go to underground beer chiller black market dealers.  What are you, heathens?

Also from the Dollar store (sensing a trend, hmmm?), is probably the worst musical recording in the history of musical recordings.  This is not even worth a dollar.  What a rip-off!

I just find something inherently wrong about peanut butter and jelly flavored vodka.  The flavors are out of control people!

I feel as if I will never comfortably sleep in a seat again, without this marvel of technology.  Available only in SkyMall, people.  Next time you fly, order up a couple and carry them around with you as you travel.  So handy!

These “pants” were lacy and translucent and actually for sale in a myriad of colors in a real store.  This is what’s wrong with society.  These things were just hanging there, innocent as can be, perpetrating the illusion that they are an article of clothing to be worn on your body.  Sigh.

These were sold in the same store.  Shockingly, not The Hootch Hut or Strippers R Us.

“Sexy Mother Pucker.”  While the name is hilariously creative, I don’t really get this stuff.  It’s supposed to pump up your lips?  With “lipswell” and “superfill?”  So, this is like some sort of faux collagen or something?  Weird.

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Seen anything bizarre or kooky in stores lately?

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