Whachoo Looking At, Boy?

It’s been a while since I phoned it in compiled a list of recent search terms that have purportedly directed people to my site.  And then Thoughtsy of Thoughts Appear’S blog fame did a similar post, so I have shamelessly copied taken inspiration from her brilliance by compiling my own most recent list of crazy and bizarre search terms.

Penis lost cartoon

Buttcrack sexy

These were both searched for on the same day.  Possibly by the same person, as far as I know.  Not sure what exactly led them to my blog, as I don’t recall posting anything about a lost penis nor buttcracks being sexy.  That I remember, anyway.

Spycam cameltoe

Waldo thought he whacked her

These were both a few days later.  I’m pretty sure I haven’t talked a lot about cameltoe in the past.  That’s more Vesta’s forte.  But a spycam cameltoe?  I’m not even sure how that’s logistically possible.  Like, is it a spycam shaped like a cameltoe, or is it a spycam situated in a cameltoe.  You know what . . . I’ve spent too much time contemplating this already.  And I honestly do not want to know the answer to that question.  Let’s move on.

This next one gives me pause.  Is there some psycho Waldo walking around killing innocent women?  Maybe that’s why he’s so hard to find?  But why, praytell, is someone searching for this?  There are some real sickos out there.  Man.

stop posting nasty pictures

Wait, but . . . what will I post about, then?  I don’t appreciate you Mr. Random Searcher telling me what to do with my blog, either.  So there.

Chocolate dildos

Happy Valentine’s Day!!  Here’s a dick.  Yeah, I’m thinking that would get a little too . . . melty.

lifeguard men nipple rings

Now, I know that I did post some gratuitous pictures last summer of lifeguards running on the beach.  Yet, I fail to recall any mention of them having nipple rings.  Also . . . this was searched for six times, and then brought people to my site.  That’s a lot of nipple rings.

drunk chick fucks at the train tracks

Was this some vital piece of news that I missed?  Because there were 2 searches for this.  I have no idea how they came to my site.

pics of New Zealand sluts

Well, you’re not gonna find any of that on this site.  I mean, all of the New Zealanders I know are fine, upstanding, chaste citizens.  Well . . . then again, there is this one.  Ok, fine searchers . . . here!

Bex

I’m sorry, Bex! I love you.

hot strawberry shortcake slut

Yeah, I’ve got nothing for this one.  What an odd fetish.  Is there a “hot my little pony slut” search out there as well?  Wait, do not answer that!

pee stained pantyhose

Another fetish that I probably don’t need to know about.  Oh, and 3 people searched for this and found my blog.  Why?

the name of human body inside things with map

This one I know why.  I did this post, eons ago (seriously, it was the fourth post I ever did!), about not knowing where the appendix is, and I included a picture of organs inside the body.  A picture I got from somewhere online.  Well, apparently, my blog is the preeminent place for people in India to find that picture.  It is pretty much my most visited post, but with the fewest comments.  They are going there solely to copy the picture.  But I’ve never heard it referred to as a map before.  That’s new.

ass boy and clothed girls

Hmmmm.  This actually seems like the absolute opposite of what I usually have on my blog.  Maybe clothed boy and ass girls?  Yeah, that’s the search I could see. 

———————————————————————————————————————

Ok, your turn . . . what are some strange search terms you’ve had lately?

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41 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Vesta Vayne
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 09:23:08

    Ha! Ah, search terms, so much fun. Yesterday I got one for ‘camel toe illustrated’, not sure if that’s like Sports Illustrated, or if they wanted drawings. But the best one from yesterday was ‘does cayenne pepper give big butt’

    Um…

    Reply

  2. Jen
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 09:48:17

    My favorite search term had to be “transparent cattle dildos”. I . . .I don’t even know where to go with that.

    Reply

  3. hiddinsight
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 10:02:42

    Oooooh…I like this game! I’ve got “my muscles hurt” and “the human brain foggy” over here…and a lot of anatomy surprises. Also, I made up this word for a blog post, but apparently it’s a real thing because everyone comes to my blog to read about what it’s not…did you know taboolicious is real!?

    Reply

  4. pegoleg
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 11:49:50

    I don’t check the search terms very often, so you inspired me to blow away the cobwebs and check them out. Apparently I don’t get those weird, sexual search terms. Really. I must run a dull place.

    But I did have a search just this week for “hangover peg”. What? What have people been saying? I didn’t think anybody I knew was AT that party?

    Reply

  5. atypicallyrelevant
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 12:27:00

    Ready for this one? Titty slaughter. Seven times.

    Yeah, I got nothin’ either.

    Reply

  6. Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 12:39:12

    “blood covered owl pics” – which, to be fair, I did write a post about. Also “dragon farts” and “oldvintage pee and pooping.com,” and why would I keep looking after that one?

    Reply

    • mistyslaws
      Feb 13, 2013 @ 20:56:01

      I remember that owl post. But is there a site about vintage pee and poop? Seriously, like people keeping . . . old . . . yeah, I can’t even . . .

      Reply

  7. JM Randolph
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 12:43:37

    Chocolate dildos cracked me up. I haven’t had any good searches lately- the top ones are of Berlin-specific icons, puggles, and stepmom porn (but like, generic, and unimaginative. *sigh*)

    Reply

  8. winopants
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 14:54:14

    Waldo thought he whacked her? What does that even mean?
    I don’t get anything too crazy on ramble. My work blog gets some slightly funnier searches (if still tame), one of my favorite being “winter dream wino” Sounds so romantic. Today “white guy on food network” showed up. I hate to tell this person, you’re not narrowing your search down much.

    Reply

  9. The Byronic Man
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 17:47:04

    Wow, I haven’t done a search-engine post in a while. Going through the search terms is always good for a laugh. A confused, disturbed laugh.

    Reply

  10. prttynpnk
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 18:15:20

    If I were a super hero I would of course show minimal initiative and go for being a sidekick so that i could be part of ‘ass boy and clothed girl’….

    Reply

  11. Bluzdude
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 18:21:45

    I got this search a few weeks ago: “If farting were taxed I’d be in serious trouble.” Belgrade, Serbia. I do NOT want to know what they’re eating in Serbia.

    Reply

  12. the cotton floozy
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 19:10:50

    My searches are normal. You know, lesbian hookers, crochet bikinis, anything with the word poop. And ‘spycam cameltoe’? How do you think I found your blog?

    Reply

  13. Valerie
    Feb 01, 2013 @ 22:44:48

    Spy am camel toe is exactly how I found you… What!?!

    Hugs!

    Valerie

    Reply

  14. tazer warrior princess
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 01:14:43

    Today?

    Unicorn meat.

    Reply

  15. cestlavie22
    Feb 02, 2013 @ 20:40:43

    When I read this post I was excited thinking this could be a new blog idea for me…sadly my search terms are not all that funny…however when I looked at all time search terms I did find a few questionable ones for example “baby private parts” I do not even want to know…

    I also wanted to mention that I mentioned you in a post – “http://cestlavie22.wordpress.com/2013/02/02/taking-a-little-time-for-me/” Hope you dont mind 🙂

    Reply

  16. transformednonconformist
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 01:12:47

    BUTT CRACK YEAST INFECTION – over 30 times

    I don’t understand why people search for some of this stuff to begin with.

    Reply

  17. Go Jules Go
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 08:25:48

    Ha, wow. It is so true, though – you always catch yourself at that certain moment: “I have just thought about this WAY too long.”

    Reply

  18. Valentine Logar
    Feb 03, 2013 @ 09:19:22

    I refuse to look just based on the spam I delete every day, it scares me greatly.

    Reply

  19. thoughtsappear
    Feb 04, 2013 @ 18:34:15

    I knew that Waldo was dangerous.

    Reply

  20. Trackback: If You Don’t Repost This, It Still Means You Want Me To Die | Peg-o-Leg's Ramblings

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