A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I had received a super rad birthday present from my friend Jules . . .
And upon perusing this amazingly fantastic book, I discovered a recipe that I felt I was compelled to try. One bacon recipe out of the hundreds that called out to me as the first item that must be concocted from the plethora of deliciously tempting options. But this siren recipe was not for me. No, it summoned me to create this unique treat for none other than my friend Thoughtsy.
You see, I had plans to meet her for dinner this past week. And although the date kept getting moved around and rescheduled, we somehow finally got our shit together enough to actually make it happen. So, having discovered this recipe in the book earlier, and wanting to try to make it for Thoughtsy, I figured this would be the perfect time to try it out. Not to mention that it looked super easy and only had four ingredients. Score!!
I will admit, though, that finding fig jam wasn’t the easiest task. Luckily, my supermarket actually had some, but it was Fig preserves, so I was going über fancy. The rest of the stuff was cake. (Mmmm, cake).
So, they kinda look like Pop Tarts, no? I mean, sort of more like pastries, but what do you expect from 4 ingredients. This is what they looked like inside:
Well, I guess you are wondering how they tasted now, aren’t you? Jeesh, you are so demanding! Well, I will say this. They weren’t bad. They weren’t necessarily good, but not horrible. I wouldn’t particularly say they tasted like Pop Tarts, though. More of a savory fig tart. Although, you can really taste the bacon (maybe because I used an approximate fuckton of it).
But, if you are a fan of both figs and bacon, you just might enjoy this. The recipe is above, so if you are feeling it, go for it!
Oh, and if you want to know if Thoughtsy liked them . . .
. . . well, she at least pretended to like them. But even if she didn’t end up enjoying them, I also provided a back up that I know she loves. You can’t go wrong with Red Velvet Pop Tarts. And lest you think I escaped gifting, Thoughtsy brought a couple of things for me as well:
We’ve come to discover that she always brings me some kind of flavored booze, and I always bring her some sort of Pop Tarts. It’s our thing. And it works for us, apparently. We’re totally ok with that.
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Don’t forget to visit Noa’s League of Funny Bitches All-Stars page!! Vote for me (and any other funny bitch you prefer). I’m about halfway down the long list of super funny bitches. Please, please, please, please, please??? I’ll make you Pop Tarts!! (Just be careful what you wish for, there).
Mar 25, 2013 @ 08:35:53
Like. Double like. Triple like! When you sent that picture via text, I was frothing at the mouth. But I see what you mean now… I feel like they need a 5th ingredient… At first I thought cheese (because that’s always my first thought…after bacon and booze), but that might be weird. I guess I’m thinking of some sort of savory brie Pop-Tart. Like raspberry and brie!
Or a maple bacon pop-tart.
I could go on for days, ladies.
Mar 25, 2013 @ 09:23:58
Brie? YES. You are a genius, Jules. Goat cheese and fig works too.
Mar 25, 2013 @ 09:24:35
What can I say, Rache? Cheese is my muse.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:45:47
Brie or goat cheese would have taken this to the next level, I believe. A maple bacon pop tart? Stop yourself. Now you are just out of control.
I may need to try that out . . . without a recipe. Get the fire extinguisher ready!
Mar 25, 2013 @ 09:25:39
I know you don’t believe me, but I swear I liked them! And I thought the fig preserves were sweet.
Thank you so much for making them!
PS: I liked them so much I didn’t even share them with…anyone. That should say something.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:46:31
Wow, I might just believe you if you didn’t
foist them uponshare them with anyone. 😉 Glad you enjoyed them!Mar 25, 2013 @ 09:26:06
Those are some fancy Pop Tarts, Misty! I’m going to have to make a bacon tie one day. The cover of that book is epic.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:47:44
Please let me be involved in this bacon tie making endeavor. Just for the picture taking, of course. I wouldn’t try to eat it. Maybe. Probably. Oh, forget it . . . now I really want some bacon.
Mar 25, 2013 @ 10:51:25
I think they came out wonderfully!! I’m not a fig fan, but you throw bacon on anything and I’ll eat it!
Hugs!
Valerie
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:48:26
I’m not a big fig fan, either, and they were . . . fine. Like I said, they were ok. I think they needed a cheese or something to add to the taste. It was just a little MEH.
Mar 25, 2013 @ 13:48:27
If only I have time to make something delicious like this, I know I could perhaps gain pounds and feel better about myself 🙂
I skipped reading, I was too busy drooling 🙂
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:49:03
It took me no time at all!! If it was time consuming, I wouldn’t have done it. So simple. Get to it!! 🙂
Mar 25, 2013 @ 15:28:09
An approximate fuckton of bacon is exactly the right amount to use. In anything. Ever.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:49:27
I concur. Hence the exact measurement.
Mar 25, 2013 @ 16:54:15
That’s copious amounts of bacon you’ve got there. Please eat a carrot today to balance out your bacon pastries and booze – we’d like to keep you around for a while.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:49:51
I had carrots for lunch!! Check. 🙂
Mar 25, 2013 @ 17:58:49
The fig/bacon… wait… “figgon” pop tarts look amazing. But what kind of restaurant lets you bring your own appetizers? Never knew a lawyer could be such a scofflaw…
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:51:13
You have to know the laws to break them. Haven’t you MET any other lawyers? There’s a reason there are so many lawyer jokes, you know.
I kinda snuck them in, and she didn’t actually eat them there. They were safely put away after the posed pic, to be eaten another day.
Mar 25, 2013 @ 19:52:49
Oooh, I have been wondering about those red velvetarts! Keep us posted on what you make with your gifts…yum…what? Gone already?
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:52:12
Huh? What? Was I supposed to share? Drats. Besides, they were itty bitty airplane sized bottles, not huge ones. Are they supposed to last more than a day?
Mar 26, 2013 @ 00:20:07
Wow, I am in awe that you made Thoughtsy homemade pop tarts. I don’t know about the bacon part, but they certainly look delicious!
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:52:38
Well, the book WAS 50 shades of bacon, so it kind of went with the territory.
Mar 26, 2013 @ 09:16:52
I was about to invite you to a potluck dinner but I just remembered you don’t need to bring anything.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:53:18
Hmm, that does pose a problem. Good thing I already ate all the pop tarts then, huh?
Mar 26, 2013 @ 20:34:08
I was not aware that one could make pop tarts. I thought that they were only a machine made food, born of some terrible machine in a dark and ancient factory, filled with corn derivatives and sugar. That being said, strawberry is my favorite. Not that I would ever try to combine that with bacon.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:54:51
Yeah, strawberry and bacon sounds revolting. But I could get on board with just strawberry. With frosted coating, of course. I think I need a just pop tart cookbook! 🙂
Mar 28, 2013 @ 05:43:11
Mmm… bacon and pastry are my favourites.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:55:02
You would love these, then.
Apr 12, 2013 @ 16:10:35
All they need is cheese and they’d be the perfect meal … do they have cheese??
Mar 30, 2013 @ 13:55:48
I don’t eat bacon or really like figs, but those things look really good!
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:55:17
Well . . . at least it LOOKS appealing then, right? 😉
Apr 02, 2013 @ 10:46:26
I’m sorry those tarts weren’t great, but they sure LOOKED great.
Apr 09, 2013 @ 15:55:37
Well, looks can be deceiving. But they were just ok.