Things To Be Thankful For

Around this time of year, you will see many bloggers posting about the things they are thankful for.  Things like . . . family, friends, pumpkin pie, etc.

Well, this is not going to be one of those posts.  I’m not going to give you a list of things that I am thankful for.  I mean, I could, of course.  Obviously, there are many good things in my life, and many reasons to be thankful.  And this is the time of year people reflect and try to be appreciative of all the things that don’t suck right now.  So, this would be the obvious time to give you my thankful items.  But I won’t do that to you.  Because really, do you care about all of the stuff I’m thankful for?  No, you don’t.  You’ve got your own shit going on, your own list of things, your shopping and Thanksgiving meal to prepare.  Why would I make you read some list of stuff you don’t care about?  I wouldn’t.  Because I care, dammit.  You’re welcome.

So, instead of some list, what I’m gonna give you is this . . .

A giveaway!!

That’s right.  So, even if you don’t have anything to be thankful for right now, if you win these items, you will.  See how that works?  I’m a giver.  And for that you can be thankful.  Bam!


There are some pretty fun things here, yes?  And if you win, and there’s something that you don’t want, well guess what is right around the corner?  That’s right . . . it’s Re-giftmakus!!!

Just in case you can’t see all of the goodies in the picture above, let me break it down for you:

– Bleeped out Knee Socks
– Blingtastic mouse
– Retro hand set for cell phone
– Beer keg koozie
– Oh Snap magnet
– Could You Be a Bigger Bitch? gum (you know you wanna give that to someone).
– Maybe You Touched Your Genitals hand sanitizer
– Work Sucks red knit cap (Office Space style)

All you have to do to be entered is comment.  Yep, no hoops to jump through here, folks.  It’s the holidays and we’re all tired already.  And we haven’t even hit Black Friday yet.

As always, my spawn will do the honors and pick a big wiener in a week or so.  Whenever I get around to it.  Because I’m busy, that’s why.  Don’t rush me!

In the meantime, I hope all of you and yours have a wonderful Thanksgiving, and celebrate it as was intended by our forefathers . . . with a big full belly in front of the tube watching a football game with some booze in your hand.  Ahhhh, now that’s what I’m thankful for!

And do not fear . . . the epic tale of Val’s most recent visit is in the works and pending for next week.  It will be a two-parter.  Yes, it was that epic.  As if you had any doubt.

Happy Turkey Day!!

(And if you’re so inclined, feel free to tell me what you’re thankful for in the comments.  Only if you want to, though.  No pressure).

I Got Banged

It was time. 
A girl can only go so long in her life without experimenting a bit.  
And really, the last time it happened to me, I was just a kid!  Not yet ensconced in the mire of habit and predictability. 
So, I did it.  I went a little wild and crazy, and did something different. 
And I don’t regret it.  
Nope, I’m gonna own it, loud and proud.  I don’t care what kind of labels people may attach to me now that I’ve made the move.  Maybe it’s for the best, after all.  Shows me who my true friends are. 
And I’ll tell you . . . I feel different.  As if this one act of daring has somehow changed me forever.  It feels good to be bad. 
And lest you judge me, I have to tell you that I just couldn’t do it the same way again.  It was enough!  The same old boring up and down, just the usual, trim and blow I always have.  I’m beyond that.  
It’s a new me.  And I feel no shame.
Before . . .

Before . . .


I’m not what you would call a high-maintenance, stylish, Real Housewife kind of girl.  I would consider my style as professional (for work) and comfortable (for home).  There’s not a lot of in between.  Very, very rarely I will wear a dress, but when that happens, it pretty much means that someone is getting married. 

Same thing with my hair.  I get it cut about every six months.  I’ve been going to the same stylist for the last 10 years or so, and each time I go, I basically tell her to do the same thing, with very little variation.  Although, I do consistently ask her to cut it a little bit shorter each time.  She mostly acquiesces, with only the slightest amount of resistance.  Usually, she throws some layers in there, just to give it a little oomph, and I routinely walk out of the salon, looking like this:

Picture 3519 Picture 3796

Lather, rinse, repeat . . . literally. 

I can usually tell when it’s about time to get a cut, because people will start making comments about how long my hair is getting.  Anything approaching shoulder length is “long” for me.  And usually, I get fed up with the  maintenance and blow drying time long before the comments start.  But something was different this time.  I kind of liked the length.  True, I still hated the styling part, but it had gotten so long this time, that I could actually pull it back without it looking goofy, which is not something I am normally able nor willing to do.  Especially at work. 

Picture 12211

Me, at work. In what is essentially a ponytail. Crazy, right?

But, I knew I needed to do something to it, as it was getting a bit unwieldy, what with all the dead ends and such (one very significant drawback to bi-yearly cuttings).  Plus, I had that most magical of days off, Veteran’s Day, where I normally run errands while most of the rest of the country is working or at school.  (Thanks vets!!).  So, I decided that this would be the perfect time to pay a visit to my stylist.

I went in knowing what I was going to do. At some point, the idea had begun brewing around in my head, and now I just needed to be brave enough to pull the trigger.  My stylist was delighted when I told her I wanted to keep it long, with no layers and . . . bangs!  She may have giggled and clapped.  Adorable. 

The reactions have been mixed from family, friends and colleagues.  And even from myself!  One minute, I think it’s awesome, and the next I wonder who that girl is in the mirror wearing the Cleopatra wig.  The hubs’ first reaction was that it was “different,” and when I asked if he liked it, he said yes, but when I followed up with, “would you tell me if you didn’t?” he responded, “probably not.”  This ain’t his first rodeo.

Here are some other reactions I received:

– “You daring hot mama!” 
– “Sassy.”
– “A new you.  Very cute!”
– “Oooh, I like it!!”
– “You look 10 years younger” (to which I replied, “Oh, 28.  I’ll take it!” . . . to which she said, “Oh, you’re that old???”  Um, thanks?)
– Male colleague standing in my doorway quietly laughing . . . Me: “Don’t just stand there laughing at me, it’s very rude!”  Him:  “No!  It’s just that I’ve never seen you be daring before.  You always just do the same thing.  And . . . . It’s not as fluffy.”

Whether it turns out to be a good idea, or bad, it comes down to this . . . it will eventually grow back.  It’s only hair, after all.