Recently, my husband and I attended a wedding for his boss in Fredericksburg, VA. It is almost a two hour drive from our home to this location, yet despite the distance, we planned to drive down for the wedding and then return later that night. The drive down was uneventful, thankfully, as you never know what you might hit when you have to drive near and around DC. I’ve had the pleasant experience of sitting in massive traffic at midnight on the DC beltway. But since we left our home 3 hours before the wedding started, in anticipation of such a possibility, we arrived in Fredericksburg about an hour before the wedding. Not really knowing what “heavy hor d’oeuvres” would entail at the reception, we grabbed a quick bite a few blocks from the church at a cute little pizza place that served tapas in the bar. We ordered a few tapas to share, and it was the perfect amount of food to tide us over for the remainder of the afternoon.
The wedding itself was lovely, if longer than normal, since it was a full service with communion and everything. But, after an hour of sitting, standing, sitting, standing, standing, standing (luckily no kneeling), sitting, standing again . . . the ceremony ended with a full participant sing-along of the bride and groom’s favorite song: All You Need Is Love by The Beatles.
When we first arrived at the ceremony, I reviewed the program and saw this printed on the last page. Commenting to my husband, “I guess somebody is a fan of Love Actually,” we both wondered if there would be a horn section that would pop out of the pews randomly, and if a choir would appear in the upper balconies that lined either side of the church. Honestly, we were both kind of hoping that would occur.
Once the sing-along ended, the wedding party exited the church and set up in the atrium for greetings, as you do. While we were waiting for our turn to depart our seats, having been seated towards the back of the church, we turned and chatted it up with some of my husband’s colleagues sitting behind us. As I was standing there, facing the back of the church, I happened to look up, and saw this:
Oh my god! It is just like Love Actually!! I was kind of disappointed at that point that they didn’t take advantage of this huge behemoth of an organ and have a full on musical accompaniment with their final movie-inspired song. What a waste!
After the wedding, we made the two block trek to the reception locale, which was at a local wine bar/restaurant. Upon entering the establishment, we were greeted by a waiter holding a tray of sparkling bubbly goodness that he was handing out to each guest. As I am off the sauce for the time being, I declined and asked if he had anything non-alcoholic, like sparkling cider. He informed me that they had lots of sodas to choose from. Hmmm. Not being a soda drinker, I opted for water.
Once we moved into the main area of the restaurant, we encountered a long table, filled with food items. There was blue cheese and feta, there were some lovely lunch meats ala a charcuterie platter, and there were raw oysters. Hmmm, again. Realizing that I could not partake in any one of those items, I stood watching the hubs partake in these delicacies, while hoping that some other types food items would be served at some point. After chatting with a few of my husband’s work friends, I realized that although my shoes were relatively comfy, after the up/down, up/down ceremony, the walk to the restaurant, and now standing for a stretch, I was actually getting more hungry for a seat than anything else.
A little while after settling in at a small cocktail table, a waiter walked over with some additional goodies on a tray. He placed before us a lovely little bowl full of salmon wrapped around an herb spread. Um, gee thanks. It looked delicious, and more than booze, what I miss the most in my new restricted pregnancy diet, is sushi. So this was just an awful tease. In the “foods Misty can eat at the wedding” game, so far, I was striking out completely!
Finally, after some time, we saw another guest walk by with some kind of vegetable on their plate. The hubs, knowing that I was getting frustrated watching everyone else eat, and having had previous experience with a hungry, pregnant wife, decided to run up to the food table to see what was new that he could possibly retrieve for me. Unfortunately, all he returned with was news that there were some roasted brussels sprouts brought out, but apparently they were scooped up as soon as they were set down. (Was everyone there pregnant?). He assured me that he spoke to someone, and that they would let us know as soon as more arrived. At this point, I had merely consumed 3 glasses of water.
Eventually (this had to be after a full hour of being at this reception), an angelic lady walked over to our table with a huge bowl brimming with the most delectable brussels sprouts ever served. She scooped about half of the bowl onto our plate, and what commenced was probably the fastest eating of a vegetable ever recorded in human history. I scarfed those things! They were delicious. Either that, or I was experiencing a feeling akin to having the munchies whilst high on the weed, where anything I would have eaten at that point would have tasted like manna. Or so I assume.
Luckily, those brussels sprouts broke the damn of food served that was appropriate for pregnant person consumption. Thus followed some grilled shrimp, lobster egg rolls, seaweed wraps, beef spare ribs, and eventually a wonderfully decadent flourless chocolate cake.
By the time we left the reception for our long drive home, I was fully sated. However, that didn’t stop the hubs and I from stopping at a local Arby’s to order a few items. A shake for me, some cheese filled pretzels for him. (I tasted them, by the way, and would not recommend them to anyone).
The moral of my story seems to be that while weddings are full of love and happiness and new beginnings, they are not the best place for pregnant people. And also, that next time I need to cram some snacks into my little purse, along with my phone and lipstick.