50 Things About ME!

Ok, so usually I don’t do these kinds of things.  And truthfully, I wasn’t even tagged to do it or anything.  But let’s be honest here for a minute, mkay?  I’m totally without blogging content as of late.  I don’t know if it’s that I’m blocked creatively or just don’t have anything going on to write about.  Whatever it is, I figured I should do something so you all know I haven’t dropped off the face of the earth, so when I saw my friend Andrea post her own 50 questions/answers, I thought I might go ahead and give it a whirl.

So, here goes.  50 things about me that you may or may not give a damn about.  And . . . GO!

1. What are you wearing? Currently a button down maternity top and super comfy huge black pants.

2. Ever been in love?  Of course.

3. Ever have a terrible break-up?  Yes.

4. How tall are you?  5’5.5″

5. How much do you weigh?  Well, I am 7 months pregnant, so I think I’m weighing in somewhere between an NFL Linebacker and a Humvee.

6. Any tattoos? No, never pulled the trigger on that.  I still may someday.

7. Any piercings?  My ears are double pierced, although one hole has closed.  In my youth, my belly button was pierced, but that closed up after my first pregnancy when I had to remove the belly ring.

8. OTP (One true pair, favorite fictional couple?)  Oh man, this is tough.  Lorelei and Luke from Gilmore Girls or Wesley & Buttercup from The Princess Bride.  (I would have gone literary, but most of my favorite books don’t really have “couples.”)

9. Favorite show?  Wow, and I thought the previous one was tough.  I watch so much TV and love so many shows.  Of all time, I’d probably say Friends.  Currently though, The Amazing Race & The Good Wife.


10. Favorite bands?  Pearl Jam.  Fall Out Boy.  Foo Fighters.  Red Hot Chili Peppers.

11. Something you miss?  My mother in law and father in law.  So much.

12. Favorite song?  My husband asked me this question once, many years ago, and I still haven’t answered him!  It all depends on what genre we are talking about and what my mood is at the moment.  For simplicity’s sake, and to answer the question, I’ll go with Release by Pearl Jam.

13. How old are you? Right now, I feel about 104.

14. Zodiac sign?  Pisces.

15. Quality to look for in a partner?  Someone with the tolerance to put up with my insanity.  And a sense of humor.

16. Favorite Quote?  “Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend; and inside a dog, it’s too dark to read.”  Groucho Marx
 
17. Favorite Actor?  Johnny Depp or Robert Downey, Jr.
 
18. Favorite Color? Purple
 
19. Loud music or soft? Depends on my mood.  After a rough day and if I have a headache: soft.  If I feel like rocking out: loud.

20. Where do you go when you are sad?  Somewhere quiet and private so nobody can see me cry.
 
21.  How long does it take you to shower? 10-15 minutes.

22.  How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? Depends on whether I’m going to court or someplace where I care about my hair.  If I have to style it, it adds another 20 minutes.  If I’m just throwing my hair in a hat, from shower to out the door is about a half hour.

23. Ever been in a physical fight?  No.

24. Turn on?  Humor and intelligence.

25. Turn-off?  Hypocrites.

26. The reason I started blogging?  I needed a hobby and had started reading some other blogs and thought, “I can do this, too.”

27. Fears?  Something horrible happening to my kids and/or any of my family and friends.

28. Last thing that made you cry?  Damn Dancing with the Stars and talk about a last dance with a dying father.

29. Last time you said you loved someone?  This morning to my kids.

30. Meaning behind the name of your blog (Misty’s Laws)?    Not one of my more creative titles.  My name is Misty and I’m a lawyer.

31. Last book you read?  You Before Me by Jo Jo Moyes

32. Book you are currently reading?  High Five by Janet Evanovich (don’t judge . . . I needed something light and fun after reading about assisted suicide).

33. Last show you watched?  The aforementioned Dancing with the Stars.

34. Last person you talked to?  My secretary.

35. The relationship between you and the person you just texted?  Last person I texted was my hubs last night.  So . . . spouse.

36. Favorite food?  Pasta or sushi.

37. Place you want to visit?  So many . . . Australia, Germany, Switzerland, Singapore, Boston, Toronto.

38. Last place you were?  Right now I’m sitting at my desk at work. Prior to that, I was heating up some water for tea.  My life is uber exciting right now.

39.  Do you have a crush?  Um, no.
 
40. Last time you kissed someone?  Kissed my kids goodbye this morning.  Kissed my hubs last night.
 
41. Last time you were insulted?  By my husband this weekend.  He was being overly snarky and it got to me.  I’m sure it has nothing to do with pregnancy hormones or anything.

42. Favorite flavor of sweet?  Caramel.

43. What instruments do you play?  I used to play the clarinet in high school, but badly.  Played the piano in elementary school, also badly.  Instrument playing is apparently not my thing.

44. Favorite piece of jewelry? I don’t wear much jewelry, so I guess my wedding/engagement rings.

45. Last sport you played?  Sport?  What’s that?

46. Last song you sang? Hmmm, can’t remember.  I tend not to subject people to that form of torture.

47. Favorite chat up line?  Hey ho.  How’s tricks?

48. Have you ever used it?  Occasionally.

49.  Last time you hung out with anyone?  I went to lunch with some blogger friends last weekend.  I guess that would be considered “hanging out.”

50. Who should answer these questions next?  Anyone who feels the desire to share.

What a Big Pickle You Have

The day after all of this happened, I got to meet up with yet another of my bestest bloggy buddies, Jules.  The last time we saw each other was on a hot and sunny day in New York City for BlogHer about a year and a half ago.  The weather was a bit chillier this time, and the location wasn’t quite as urban, but I wouldn’t have missed the chance to see her again, especially since I was on her home turf!

We planned to meet at a very famous deli, conveniently located right next to my hotel, called Harold’s.

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Now, you might be wondering what is so darn impressive about Harold’s that would cause Jules to suggest this as our lunch spot, except for the convenient location, of course.  Well, Harold’s is famous for 2 things . . . the enormous size of its portions and the World’s Biggest Pickle Bar.

What big cakes you have there.

What big cakes you have there.

This was my first visit to the establishment, so I was a rookie to all things Harold’s.  Val had provided a few tips about the place, having visited a few times prior, and Jules had not been there since her teenaged years, so we settled in and looked over the expansive menu.  It was impressive.  And expensive.  A sandwich would run you about $20.  Some of the menu items were upwards of $50.  It was pretty crazy.  But like I said, the portions were enormous and every order came with unlimited visits to that pickle bar I mentioned earlier.

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Once we placed our order for a very traditional deli sandwich, corned beef, of course, we had time to peruse the inside of the napkin provided.  It was very educational:

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Yiddish 101

As we were waiting for our meal, the people at the table next to us were served their lunch.  The one item was so impressive, I had to ask if I could take a picture of it.  They very graciously allowed it.

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World’s Largest Blueberry Pancake

When our meal arrived, we finally understood why it was a $20 sandwich.  Big enough to share, we had only ordered the one sandwich, and were not disappointed with the amount of food provided.

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That sucker was big enough for each of us to have a half of the sandwich there, then take home the remaining meat to make more sandwiches later in the week.  I don’t know about Jules, but I got three more sandwiches out of it!  Now that’s a value.  Of course, it was lean and tender and delicious.  And the pickles that accompanied it were also fabulous.

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Jules in action, picking her pickles.

But!  Not only did we have a delicious lunch, yummy pickles and fabulous conversation, but Jules even provided dessert!

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Best. Cookies. EVER.

Yes, that is indeed 2 whole bags of triple chocolate chip cookies, lovingly homemade by Jules and given to yours truly.  Diet?  What diet?  They were probably the best cookies I’ve ever tasted in my life.  No hyperbole.  For real.

Sadly, Jules and I had to say adieu, when she dropped me at the train station to catch my train home.  I held out on eating any of the cookies (I was stuffed full of meat and pickles, so it wasn’t too hard), until after I passed Philly.  Sort of a “I made it through the danger zone” celebratory treat, if you will.  We’re not even gonna talk about the fact that I misread the departure time on my ticket, thus almost missing my train home.  Nope.  Let’s just focus on the cookies.  Delicious, delicious cookies.  Mmmmmm.

Thus ends the tales from my visit to the great state of Jersey.  Good friends, yummy treats and gay bars.  What more could a girl ask for?

Shenanigans with Val: A Fist Pumping Time on the Jersey Shore

Despite Philly’s best efforts to keep me away, I did finally make it up to Jersey to see Val.  As I mentioned in the previous post, my train arrived an hour later than expected, so it gave Val plenty of time to make a stop at the liquor store and pick up some “welcome to Jersey” beer.  When I arrived, I was greeted not only by Val’s beautiful and smiling face, but this gorgeous creature as well:

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That’s right . . . that says Chocolate Peanut Butter beer.  Sounds revolting, right?  It was either going to be completely disgusting, or unbelievably amazing.  But with a name like Sweet Baby Jesus, how could Val resist buying it?  So, we tried it.  And it was . . . thick and dark and pretty revolting.  But, not being punk bitches, we split it and each finished our half.  It sort of grew on you after a bit, and really, even bad beer is still beer.  But, I wouldn’t exactly recommend it, in case you were wondering.

After the beer was opened, Val gave me my Xmas present that she had been holding until we saw each other.  It was a myriad of radness all in one sparkly snowman bag:

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So. Much. Goodness.

But, what isn’t pictured is the best part of the entire gift!  Unfortunately, it was in one of those impenetrable plastic wrapped cases that I couldn’t break into.  Fortunately, Val came prepared and had no problem ripping right into that sucker.

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Plastic containers are no match for brass knuckles with a handy dandy hidden switch blade attachment!  And what was this wondrous item that Val was so helpfully and skillfully sawing open?  Well, just the most perfect and awesome thing ever!

Fuzzy Flask!!

Fuzzy Flask!!

Once I was properly presented and unpacked, I got ready to leave the room for the rest of the night.  However, since we didn’t expect to return to the room until our festivities were over at the end of the evening, I had to get dressed and ready to be out for the night. This meant clothing and make-up that I would not usually wear at 3:00 in the afternoon.  But then again, I was in Jersey.  So really, it was de rigueur, so I got ready for the night.  Once I was properly shellacked, we were off to our destination . . . Asbury Park.

Our plan was to meet one of Val’s friends, Stephanie, to get mani/pedis before we grabbed some food and then later went to a club.  But, we arrived early, and once we circled around the very trendy and popular downtown area in our attempt to find someplace to park, we finally lucked out and got a spot on a side street, and when we realized that we would have to wait for Stephanie for a bit (and that we both really had to pee), we decided to stop into the bar that we just happened to park right in front of.  We still have no idea what the name of the bar was, only seeing a symbol of an eye everywhere we looked, but there were so many beards and knit caps, that it was probably called something like The Hipster’s Den or We Liked It First, or something.  But still, we both had a beer, some pork fries (yum!), and Val got herself a new Mason jar glass.  So, it was all good.

Once we received word that Stephanie had arrived at the nail salon which was just around the corner, we finished our beer and fries and headed on over.  We all lined up in our chairs to get our toes done, and when I looked down, I realized they had some sort of fancy light system going on that changed the color of the lights every few seconds.  It was pretty cool.

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Once our toes were properly painted and beautified, we moved on to our next destination.  A bar called Johnny Mack’s.

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This particular bar, Val and Steph’s favorite, was distinctive because you got free pizza when you bought beer, plus there were mannequins and free candy!  Sounds good.

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What was also interesting was the décor.  There was writing all over the walls, and even on lamps and trashcans (mostly song lyrics on those) and on the tables and chairs.  In fact, at one point, I looked up and saw this really funky lamp over top of me and decided to take a picture.  To which Val had to add her own special brand of accompaniment, of course.

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The only bad thing about the joint was that when I went to the extremely dark bathroom, I took off my mustache mood ring to wash my hands (it’s cheap and turns when it gets wet), and left it on the shelf below the soap dispenser.  It was so dark in there you could not even see yourself in the mirror.  So, I missed it sitting there, completely forgot about it, and didn’t remember it existed until I went to wash my hands at our next destination and it wasn’t there.  And when I called, only about an hour later, they were just too damn busy for anyone to venture to the bathroom to check.  As you might imagine, nobody turned it in.  Much sadness ensued.

But, let us not dwell on unfortunate incidents, and instead move along to our next destination . . . a gay bar in a hotel near the Jersey shore.  The hotel itself is actually a gay destination (so says Wikipedia) called The Empress.  I am unaware of the actual name of the bar (seems to be a theme for the night), but was greeted by this upon our entrance, so it was sure to be a good time:

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We arrived early enough to experience the famous country line dancing that occurred before 10:00 at night, where they set up actual fences around the dance floor.  Apparently, these dancers are serious about their line dancing, so much so that the security personnel feel the need to frantically warn you off of venturing within the corral as you stand and watch, imagining the carnage which would for sure ensue for the uninitiated.

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While we awaited the end of the spectacle, we got a few beverages and perused some lovely and readily available reading material scattered around the club.

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We eventually meandered over into a side room with a bar, a dance floor and some sofas, along with 80’s dance videos playing, which was practically empty.  We settled in, watched some videos, and were there to watch some of the characters who eventually joined us over in this sad little side room.  Val met this lovely older queen, and they hit it off famously!

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There were also a few lovely ladies who graced us with some dance moves out on the floor and were just the cutest things:

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In case you are wondering, Val is the only one in those above pictures with original girl body parts.  But, they were rocking their dresses, let me tell you.

Once the night moved into the wee hours (and I started falling asleep, despite the loud, bass thumping music), the real entertainment arrived.

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Much to the enjoyment of the regular clientele, I assure you.  We were told by what I can only assume was the only straight man there (the security guy), that the place didn’t really get jumping until after 12:30, but by that time, we were all pretty exhausted and ready to head out.  So, while I don’t think I experienced the club at its prime, I was assured that if I returned in the summer, when they opened up the pool deck and things really heat up, that I would get to really see it at its best and have a grand time.  So, I guess I’ll need to make a trip back to Jersey in the summer months then.

The next day I returned home to the safety of Maryland, but not before having lunch with my bloggy friend Jules at the infamous Harold’s deli.  But that’s an entirely separate and wonderful story that I will report on in a future post.  There was just too much good stuff in Jersey for merely 2 posts.  Stay tuned . . . again.

The Perils of Travel

This past weekend, I took a trip up to New Jersey to see my good bloggy friends Val, and then Jules.  Opting not to drive, I booked a ticket on Amtrak, so that I wouldn’t have to deal with traffic and could just sit back, read a book, and arrive in about two and a half hours.  Easy peasy, lemon squeezey!

Yeah, or so I thought.  See, here’s the thing about me . . . I am a disaster when it comes to traveling by myself.  Traveling with my hubs and kids?  Cake.  Me on my own . . . tragic.  Lest you think I’m being melodramatic, let’s review . . .

Trip to Ocean City, MD, last year to meet my hubs and kids, who were already down there:

I left work a bit early to try to miss some traffic.  However, it is raining and a Friday evening . . . so, before I go 2 miles, I hit a ton of traffic.  Uh oh.  Then, once I start to move a bit, and obviously get overconfident that I might make up a bit of time . . . dead stopped cars.  I discover that there is a huge accident on the upcoming bridge, halting all movement for about 15 miles.  15 miles!  Of completely stopped traffic, just sitting in the rain.  So, yeah . . .all by myself, sitting in the car, inching along little by little, for hours.  Not a great trip. It took me almost 5 hours to make a 2 and a half hour trip.

Trip to NYC for Blogger, summer of 2012:

Flight to NYC, due to arrive at around 10:00 pm, stopover in Philly.  I blogged about this here, but short story is that there was a massive storm, halting all flights out of Philly, so I was stranded there for hours, until I wrangled my way onto a flight at around midnight.  Then, when I finally arrived in NYC around 1:30 in the morning, I find that the room I had booked many months ago, and confirmed the week prior, was not available.  And on the return trip . . . the flight out of NYC was delayed, causing me to miss my flight out of (you guessed it) Philly, and have an extra hour and a half to wait for the next available flight.

Which brings us to this past weekend . . . and a train ride:

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Here it comes . . .

I made sure I was plenty early for my 10:47 am train.  In fact, I arrived so early, I sat in my car for 20 minutes before I ventured down to the tracks.  As I stood on the platform, waiting for the train that was due to arrive in about 5 minutes, an announcement informed me that the train was running about 10 minutes late.  It was cold and windy on that platform.  But I stood there.  And waited.

The train finally arrived, and I moved to get on.  As the door opened, I realized that there was quite a gap between the platform and the train, probably a good foot and a half, and I was mentally trying to figure out how my rolling bag would make it over such a gap.  Then, I stepped onto the train, and my foot hit wet metal and started sliding.  You know how they say your life is supposed to flash before your eyes when something happens?  Well, what was flashing in front of my eyes was the huge crevice below me as my ass started falling towards the tracks.  I will attest to that whole slow motion thing, though.  As I reached out to attempt to grab onto something, anything, to stop my rapid decent, I found that there was nothing in arms reach to gain purchase upon, and I continued falling down, down, down.  Somehow, I landed in such a way that most of me stayed on the train landing.  When my fall finally came to a stop, I was lucky to only be looking down at the tracks, and not broken and bent, down below the train, as I had feared and imagined while falling.  But, I was fine.  A bit bruised from crashing to the metal landing, and having my shin hit the edge of the train, apparently, but fine.  Although, my heart was beating a bit more rapidly than a few minutes prior, that’s for sure.

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Sweet bruise.

As the journey began, I settled into my seat and tried to forget about the near death experience I had just encountered.  Everything was going smoothly . . . until we arrived in Philly.  As passengers got onto the train, a lady sat across the aisle from me and began unwrapping the most fragrant and delicious smelling cheese steak I’d ever encountered.  Having yet to eat that day, it was intoxicating.  Then, just as a little bit of drool started pooling atop the book I was reading . . . it all went dark.  Total power failure and we were underneath large concrete overpasses, so it was very dark.  So, we sat there.  In the dark.  With no idea what was happening.

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This is when the zombies would attack . . .

It was the longest time until I finally figured out what was happening.  Luckily, cheese steak lady was an Amtrak employee, so a guy came onto the train and started chatting with her about what was going on.  Otherwise, I would have been cluelessly left sitting in the dark.  Apparently, they had to change engines.  Oh that.  Sure, of course.  Uh huh.  Wait . . . what???  Yes, they were changing the engine.  I guess it was lucky that our engine died while we were stopped at a station, at least.  Crazy.  Oh, did I mention this was in my old friend, Philly?  Yeah, I’ve never actually been to Philly, but strangely, I’ve spent quite a bit of time in transportation stops in that place.  That’s how Philly and I roll.

So, eventually they got the new engine and the lights and power were once again functioning.  And we were off . . . merely an hour late.

Let there be light!

Let there be light!

Eventually, I made it to my destination.  And was met with Val and beer!  You know, because she knows me.  She was my chauffeur for the day, so she drove us to the hotel I was staying in that evening.  When I arrived, everything in the lobby was roped off with yellow tape and there were signs asking us to “Excuse our dust” as they were renovating.  Ok, no problem.  I wasn’t planning to camp out in the lobby anyway.  After I was given my room key, we went over to the elevators and were greeting by a gaping maw, all covered up with cardboard and hanging movers’ rugs.  Hmmm, that’s strange.

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Then, we arrive at my room.  And just before I open the door, I hear this very loud humming sound.  Once I opened the door, I was greeted by one of those huge rug drying machines on full blast, sitting in the middle of the floor, along with the window AC blasting air on high.  Nope, no thank you.  New room, please.  So, we trudge all the way back downstairs, assuming that the elevator and room were both part of some murder spree and clean up effort that recently occurred. The front desk guy tried to cover up by saying it was a “broken pipe on the 5th floor,” but Val and I knew better.  The next room was right across the hall, and while there was no blood stains or drying machine, it did have a funky smell.  Then, as we were in there a few minutes, we started to hear these banging sounds that sounded like they were coming from the bathroom.  There was nobody in the bathroom, so we figured that it was probably ghosts.  Upon further inspection, though, I did find this in the bathroom on the soap ledge in the shower:

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Such a classy joint.  Luckily, we had beer and a fun night out planned to distract us from the murder/pube hotel.  Which I will tell you all about in an upcoming post.  So, stay tuned for tales of the Jersey shenanigans that ensued later that day.  Cheers!

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In HER Eyes . . .

When the gauntlet was thrown down by a fellow blog friend, I had no choice but to pick it up and run with it.  Is it gauntlets or scissors you aren’t supposed to run with?  I always get that mixed up.  Eh, whatever, too late.  It’s more of a slow amble anyway, since my entire diet has consisted of cookies for the last two weeks, so I really don’t think I’m dangerous with any sharp objects right now.  Wait, what was I talking about?  Oh, right . . . gauntlets.  I suppose you are wondering what on earth I’m rambling about, yes?  Either that, or you stopped reading about 6 sentences back, and who can blame you.  But, if you are still hanging in there (and really, why?  Seriously, there is something wrong you with you.  Might wanna work on that in the new year), let me explain . . .

I was reading my friend Darla’s blog post today, and laughing hysterically at her ridiculousness, when I came upon the comments.  This is where I then saw another blog friend throw down a challenge . . . on almost every single person’s comments on the post.  Accordingly, I imagine that not much work was being done today at Peg’s place of employ, but it sure was fun to read.  This was her challenge:

Well, after all that work, by both the brilliant and clearly insane, Darla, as well as the evil genius, Peg, I had no choice but to join in on the fun.  Besides, it’s not like I was going to be posting anything otherwise today, so this is just a little extra bonus for all y’all, right?  Right?  Hello?  Oh well, I’m used to talking to myself.  I have a husband and two boys.

Ok, before I get too far afield on this tangent . . . again . . . let me present you with my choice as the most fantastical of all photoshopped wonderment that came from Darla’s twisted and wonderful brain.  I present to you . . . In Her Eyes:

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Swoon!  Who could resist that face?

Ok, now that I’ve participated, as instructed . . . it’s your turn.  If you haven’t already hit the bubbly (and hey, even if you have), go to Darla’s blog and pick one of her fabulous pictures and feature it on your blog.  And . . . go!

Well, now I’m off to have my own fabulous New Year’s fun . . . game night at my sis-in-law’s house and then in bed by 12:30.  I really do know how to party!  Cheers to you.  See you in the new year.  Have fun and be safe, everyone!

Holiday Winner!!

When I posted this last week, I told everyone it would be a quick turn around.  So here we are, turning it around.

Turn the beat around . . . love to hear percussion . . .

Try to get that out of your head today!  Yeah, sorry about that.

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Ok, so turning it around (the giveaway, not the beat!), let’s get this party started!

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And without further ado . . . the winner of the last giveaway of 2013 on Misty’s Laws is:

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LILY!!!

Well, Lily, my friend . . . it seems your week just keeps getting better!!  Starting with a minor fender bender, then an engagement, and finally, the most exciting thing to happen to you in your entire life . . . winning these two mugs!!!  Woo-hoo!

So, send me your info at mistyslaws at gmail dot com and I’ll get these in the mail to you as quickly as possible.

And, since this will possibly be my last post of the year, I just want to wish every single one of you a very festive and happy holiday, filled with fun, family and fruity cocktails!!  Feliz Navidad, my peeps.  Happy Everything!!

Holiday Quickie

Ok, I told y’all that I was going to do another giveaway before the holidays, and with commenting time, picking time and shipping time, in order to get the prize to the winner prior to the big day, I realize that I have to do this thing NOW.

So, that’s what this is.  I ordered a mug for someone for Christmas (if you receive it in the mail, act surprised and like you didn’t already see the same one on the site!) and was mistakenly sent multiple.  Thus, I am going to Santa them straight to you.  Holly Jolly, Fa La La.  Just call me your favorite Ho Ho Ho.

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So, that is two mugs, each of varying size (one is a taller mug with “I Like Big Books and I Cannot Lie” on it, and one is regular sized with “Fra-GEE-lay!” on it) for you to win!

In order to enter, just comment below and tell me your favorite holiday beverage that you like to drink this time of year.  Be it egg nog, hot cocoa or a festive cocktail, just share it below and you will be entered.  I’ll give everyone a couple of days, but then I’m having my kids pick a name this weekend, so if you want in, comment quick!

That’s it!  Told you it was a quickie.  Wait, what did you think I meant?  Pervert!

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